Changes with time...

Yesterday at the zoo was interesting...and not in a bad way. Since she was born, I have been rejecting the idea of getting close to the youngest grand-kid. I'd already apportioned future resources (including love) to Aliyah. I did not wish to make room for another one.

Of course when Aliyah was two, I had a healthly dislike for her and firmly regarded myself as a non-kid person. And by the time Aliyah was 6, the most I was willing to allow was that I was some type of hybred-auntie. But now, with another two-year-old, and a son-in-law, and me over 40, I must acknowledge that I am now a step-grandmother.

What's funniest is that I never, ever saw myself becoming this person. A person with kids in her life. Strange stuff.

Emotionally, it's so dangerous to have them in your life because you can't help but worry all the time. Your heart is forever in danger of cracking in half. Rationally, I had chosen not to have kids because of this...but sometimes they wriggle right into your life..for better or worse.

The girls at the zoo. Our first outing with the newest two year old.